09 Nov 2012

In the Trenches

Maybe blogging in the midst of heartache isn’t the wisest thing – but if I can’t be real here, where can I be real?  Thanks for witnessing my walk through this valley…. There’s a part of me that would like to stay silent.  That part of me wants to encourage others and not weigh them […]

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06 Apr 2012

Weary

God has been doing great things in our lives – seriously great things. I’ve been so busy with the things He’s sent that I’ve not written in a while and I’m feeling the need to be honest and vulnerable here. Much like the flower to the right looks, I feel.  Like I need a long, […]

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16 Jul 2010

Forgiveness – full & true?

We are settling in to our new location and decorating our apartment.  It’s been a solid 15 yrs since I’ve lived in an apartment – there are definitely things I like (not having to do the maintenance ourselves) and things I’m not so crazy about (hearing the dog upstairs run around like a maniac at […]

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24 May 2009

I Did It

Remember that phone call I had to make?  I did it – I finally sucked up every ounce of courage I had and did it. I knew that time was escaping and it was getting to critical mass for me. As I went to sleep last night, I couldn’t even honestly pray, “God, give me […]

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20 May 2009

rage

Of all the things on this journey that I didn’t expect, it has been the depth of sheer anger and rage I have at a man who has been dead nearly 20 years.  I am a natural redhead and have borne jokes through the years about my supposed anger.  The truth is that I’m really […]

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04 May 2009

Finding a New Normal

My husband and I had our first Theophostic meeting last week and I’ve pondered how to describe it and write about it for a full week now.  I’m really glad we went and we’ll be going back next week.  God completely showed up and met us there – and let’s face it:  He didn’t have […]

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09 Jan 2009

i am not a rock

Simon & Garfunkel sang a song back in the 60s called “I am a Rock.”  Selected lyrics are as follows: I’ve built walls, A fortress deep and mighty, That none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain. It’s laughter and it’s loving I disdain. I am a rock, I am an […]

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19 Dec 2008

Why is porn use so shameful?

Once again I find myself pondering deep questions and concepts and this seems to be a good place to hash some of this out.  So bear with me, if you will. In a discussion pertaining to pornography use and the shamefulness we see in those who partake and who are addicted, someone suggested that it’s […]

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16 Oct 2008

hiccups & ball gowns

Every path to healing through addiction (no matter what type of addiction) will have divots in the road, or hiccups where the addict stumbles. Sexual addiction is no different from that. And yet, somehow I had this faulty idea that once we began down the path to healing that it would be rainbows & butterflies. […]

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27 Aug 2008

The Eighth Thorn

As I mentioned in a previous post, God showed me that there were “thorns” in my heart that were symbolic of things that were done or said to me that I had neglected to deal with adequately at a previous time. These things had grown in to symbolic thorns that caused me continual pain and […]

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